Trouble Sleeping?
When I first suffered loss, I found sleeping so so difficult. As emotionally tired as I felt as soon as I put my head on the pillow I could not stop my mind from thinking, of grieving, of remembering. One thing that helped me was - and don’t laugh! - was running up and down the stairs to tire me out phsyically…I didn’t feel like going out so I used my home gym, the stairs!
What this did was tire me out and made me feel more tired. Before I went to bed I had a small nightcap and a cup of hot chocolate and found that it helped me sleep. How do you sleep? Can you offer any suggestions to others?
Tags: broken-heart, dealing-with-bereavement, death, emotional-support, family, fear, friends, Grief, grief-cycle, losing-a-spouse, love, rage, terminal-illness, widow, widowerRelated Stories
POSTED IN: Comfort Yourself, Grief, Loneliness, Guilt & Depression, Pragmatic Issues
4 opinions for Trouble Sleeping?
Neill Neill
Dec 4, 2006 at 11:08 am
Hi Anna,
Sleep disturbance seems to be almost universal in the aftermath of severe loss or other trauma.
In spite of years of personal work, my sleep was all messed up after I recently lost my son. And I got sick. I’m getting back to normal now, this time a little faster than after past losses (father, mother, brother, brother-in-law, etc.).
Two things have helped a lot. This time I was ready to accept the love, prayers and healing energy from others. There has been a huge outpouring of it and I’ve been uplifted by it. In the past I believe I was less willing to simply accept it with thanks; I used to meet it with thoughts of “You couldn’t understand.”
This time a wise friend took me aside and said “clear your regrets.” I took some steps to let go of any regrets I was carrying about my son, my relationship with him, my past mistakes, etc. As the regrets slip away, peace seems to be replacing it.
Sleep that “mends the ravelled sleeve of care” is returning to regularity.
Love and blessings,
Neill
Widows Quest » A wonderful lesson in helping others
Dec 5, 2006 at 6:43 am
[…] You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site. Related Posts: September 11th - The Memories Live OnThank you!Can we helpTiffany with her grief?How to build your support network and make new friendsBlog Carnival - Helping others with Grief […]
Shari
Dec 14, 2007 at 6:35 am
I read all the hints about falling asleep. However, My problem is waking up every single night since my husband died about the same time. I then have trouble going back to sleep and I end up staying up. This time is the time that my husband began to pass away.(about 2-2:30am). So I know it has something to do with the fact that I was sleeping and almost didn’t wake up in time to comfort him and talk to him as this happened. I would love any suggestions on how to get over the time block that I have. I am in counseling but it hasn’t helped yet.
Thank you for your help.
anna
Dec 14, 2007 at 9:43 am
Shari
I can fully understand why you are waking up and why it is difficult to get over….mmm what would I do, well I think it is about accepting the past and thinking about what you can and can’t change. Your husband has passed away, you didn’t wake up…they are both facts that you cannot change as much as you want to. I would spend time talking to myself that that HAS happened, nothing can change that. What you can change is the future. One way might be doing an affirmation 3 times a day…now this may sound strange but can work. Write down on a piece of paper something like…I enjoy feeling full of energy after a good nights sleep. Read it out loud 3 times a day for 21 days….what that is trying to do is to teach your subconcious that it wants to sleep rather than wake up. Sounds weird but it can work…let me know! As always I fully understand and my heart goes out to you over your loss….
Have an opinion? Leave a comment: