Widows Quest

My 10 Tips on Coping with Grief

by anna on March 28th, 2007

I posted yesterday about an e-mail I got from someone who is really hurting and I would like to thank people for the great comments. I though I would post my tips on coping with grief

1. Give yourself an aim for each day - write down things that you are going to do and do them no matter how hard.
2. Make sure you eat healthily - your body needs fuel to cope with the grief
3. Exercise - I go for a 30 minute walk and get my heart working for the day
4. Think of one dream that you have always had….and make it happen
5. A memorial was important for me to bring closure. Once finished I knew that I could not bring him back, I will never forget but I knew on the completion that I had to let go of the regrets, the “if only”, the why did this happen. This sounds awful - but it has, you cannot change the past, you can only change the future.
6. I started to look after myself - I am dieting at the moment on Middle Age Shed and have lost 32lbs! Why not join me and my friend, the diet has given me a focus again in my life- just respecting myself and has made me feel better. I throw out tatty clothes and went and got some more - mainly from charity shops but they are great.
7. Talk - I am quite shy about my feelings, a bit of  a closed book - but I forced myself to talk about how I was feeling but more importantly what I was going to do about it.
8. If money is short - turn it round in your head from being a problem to a challenge. I know this makes it sound easy and for me it wasn’t but I challenged myself to earn a little more each month. I did cleaning for neighbours, sold CD’s on Amazon, washed cars whilst I found a better job….ok the pride initially took a hit but I am proud of the fact that I have worked my way out of trouble.
9. Write down each night something that you have achieved….3 positives.And keep adding to the list. My first ones were I survived, I got up…..but they steadly grew.
10. Vanilla candles and peppermint. Both help serotonin in the brain and improve positive thinking.

Overall, remember you are not alone. Remember there are others out there who are hurting and who are role models that you can use for motivation. You can do it, I am not there yet but hey I am 100% better than I was……just never give up.

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POSTED IN: Grief